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Cyberbullying is a very serious issue affecting not just the young victims, but also the victims’ families, the bully, and those who witness instances of cyberbullying. Cyberbullying can be most detrimental to the victim as they may experience a number of emotional issues that affect their social and mental health.
As parents today, you may not have ever experienced cyberbullying yourself. It may be hard to fathom how some words of text on a computer screen can lead to such trauma. After all, bullying has seemingly always been a facet of school and on the playground. Perhaps you have seen or experienced bullying when you were in school. Maybe you feel that bullying is just a normal part of school life.
You might also think that face-to-face bullying is much worse than cyberbullying since the victims of real-world bullying have more difficulty escaping their tormentors, while a victim of cyberbullying can simply turn off the computer or block a bully on a social media platform.
Unfortunately, it’s not that simple. It is mandatory to recognize a change in your loved one’s behavior as a result of cyberbullying, and to find a way to help them in a supportive manner.
Types of Cyberbullying
Exclusion
Exclusion is the act of leaving someone out deliberately. Exclusion exists with in-person bullying situations, but is also used online to target and bully a victim. For example, your child might be excluded/uninvited to groups or parties while they see other friends being included, or left out of message threads or conversations that involve mutual friends.
Harassment
Harassment is a broad category under which many types of cyberbullying fall into, but it generally pertains to unconsented conduct, such as threatening or harassing email/instant messages, or to blog entries or websites dedicated solely to tormenting an individual. Harassment does not include constitutionally protected activity or conduct that serves a legitimate purpose, i.e., free speech
Outing/Doxing
Outing, also known as doxing, refers to the act of openly revealing sensitive or personal information about someone without their consent for purposes of embarrassing or humiliating them. This can range from the spreading of personal photos or documents of public figures to sharing an individual’s saved personal messages in an online private group. The key is the lack of consent from the victim.
Trickery
Trickery is similar to outing, with an added element of deception. In these situations, the bully will befriend their target and lull them into a false sense of security. Once the bully has gained their target’s trust, they abuse that trust and share the victim’s secrets and private information to a third party or multiple third parties.
Cyberstalking
Cyberstalking is a particularly serious form of cyberbullying that can extend to threats of physical harm to the person being targeted. It can include monitoring, false accusations, threats, and is often accompanied by offline stalking. It is a criminal offense and can result in a restraining order, probation, and even jail time for the perpetrator.
Fraping
Fraping is when a bully uses your child’s social networking accounts to post inappropriate content with their name. It can be harmless when friends write funny posts on each other’s profiles, but has potential to be incredibly harmful. For example, a bully posting racial/homophobic slurs through someone else’s profile to ruin their reputation.
Masquerading
Masquerading happens when a bully creates a made up profile or identity online with the sole purpose of cyberbullying someone. This could involve creating a fake email account, fake social media profile, and selecting a new identity and photos to fool the victim. In these cases, the bully tends to be someone the victim knows quite well.
Dissing
Dissing refers to the act of a bully spreading cruel information about their target through public posts or private messages to either ruin their reputation or relationships with other people. In these situations, the bully tends to have a personal relationship with the victim, either as an acquaintance or as a friend.
Trolling
Trolling is when a bully will seek out to intentionally upset others by posting inflammatory comments online. Trolling may not always be a form of cyberbullying, but it can be used as a tool to cyberbully when done with malicious and harmful intent. These bullies tend to be more detached from their victims, and do not have a personal relationship.
Flaming
This type of online bullying constitutes of posting about or directly sending insults and profanity to their target. Flaming is similar to trolling, but will usually be a more direct attack on a victim to incite them into online fights.
Behavior changes on Cyberbullied children
The changes might not be readily apparent at first, but as time goes on, you may notice one or more of the following behavioral changes that can be strong indicators of cyberbullying.
- A drop in social behavior — avoiding friends or social events
- Isolating his or herself in their room more than usual
- Becoming more quiet or withdrawn
- Finding it hard to concentrate on schoolwork
- Grades dropping
- Losing interest in activities that they normally enjoy
- Skipping school or expressing a desire to skip school
- Appearing angry when looking at their phone, tablet, or computer
- Hiding their phone or computer screen from view
- Avoiding using their phone
- Using drugs or alcohol
- Expressing dark thoughts or emotions
- Talking about suicide
If you think that some of these behavioral changes seem a bit extreme, such as thoughts of suicide, you should know that the relationship between bullying and suicide is a strong one. In some cases, bullying alone may not always be the sole cause. The child may already be experiencing feelings of depression or anxiety due to problems at home or a previous history of trauma.
The effects of cyberbullying also include mental health issues, increased stress and anxiety, depression, acting out violently, and low self-esteem. Cyberbullying can also result in long-lasting emotional effects, even if the bullying has stopped.
General Effects of Cyberbullying
Unlike face-to-face bullying that can be avoided by staying indoors, cyberbullying is hard to escape. People use their smartphones or tablets constantly, and cyberbullying can happen anytime, anywhere. They may feel that they have no control over the situation.
In the case of children, most of them may refrain from telling their parents about cyberbullying because of the fear that their devices can be snatched away from them for obvious reasons. Sometimes, the bully may threaten the child that their life or the lives of their family members may be in danger if they expose the bully, which the child believes.
The emotional impact of cyberbullying
Cyberbullying can take a toll on victims by being a significant stressor in their lives. According to studies, three out of every 10 people who are victims of cyberbullying display at least one symptom of stress.
Embarrassment
Cyberbullying can involve sharing nasty posts, messages, or texts posted publicly. This can cause the victim to become embarrassed and feel humiliated because now a lot of people come to know about the issue.
Shame and guilt
The bullies may upload the victim’s sensitive information to the Internet, and that can do a lot of emotional damage to the child. They may develop guilt for going online and bringing shame to themselves and family. It is important to stand strong with the victim and help them realize that it was unfortunate, but you have their back.
Anxiety
For obvious reasons, the victim may be anxious and lose interest in their studies, sports, and daily activities. This may set up a cycle of anxiety issues in the future, culminating in a breakdown or depression. It is important to sit with the child and have a heart-to-heart talk regarding her fear.
Isolation
When the victim face cyberbullying, they can avoid meeting their friends or avoid school or group gatherings. This can make them miss out on precious friendships.
To make matters worse, especially parents can ask their kids to surrender their smartphones to them. This can push the kids into further isolation because smartphones are a major source of connecting with close ones and friends.
Victims of cyberbullying often find it difficult to feel safe. They may feel vulnerable and powerless.
In severe cases, cyberbullying can make the victim fall prey to psychiatric issues, such as anxiety and depression. It can also provoke the victim to think about taking drastic steps, something as serious as committing suicide.
